Bright sunny mornings make the sound of the alarm clock going off slightly easier to bear, but what kind of waker-upperer are you?
We’ve identified five categories. Which do you fall in to? Or do you straddle more than one?
We get it, you’re perfect and everyone wants to be you! You step out of bed abruptly, with a spring in your step, after the very first beep of your alarm. You’re so sure of yourself that you didn’t even need to set any other alarms, and the word “snooze” is not in your vocabulary.
You shudder at the thought of bad punctuality and you cringe at dilly-dalliers on the wayside. Your routine is surgical and finely-crafted to give you the best start to the day that you can have. To all the Clinicals out there, we salute (and envy) you.
Could we find anyone more opposite to the Clinical than the Manic? Your life may have been largely unchanged for years, but you still manage to find a way to spice up each morning with a different flavour of panic each and every time. Breakfast in the shower? Toothpaste in your coffee?
There is no concept more alien to you than “order” (we’ll leave the psychoanalysis on that one to our dear friend Freud). Even so, your abilities to shape your day on the back of the chaotic whirlwind that is your “morning routine” is a sight to behold.
“Chill out, man,” says the Casual. “We got the whole day ahead of us.” That may be true, but the day doesn’t wait for us!
The Casual comes in many shapes and sizes, both organised and totally unprepared, clean and messy, smiling and miserable. The Casual saunters into the shower with the swagger of a rock star and plods down the stairs with the urgency of a teenaged sloth.
“How do they pull it off?” people ask. Well, mostly, they don’t, but to those special Casuals whose creed interferes not a jot with their punctuality… please let us in on your secret.
The Snoozer lives their life on the edge, that being an edge very much created by their own ineptitude. The snooze button is as familiar to them as their own family and is perhaps closer to their heart too.
Alarms are rendered essentially redundant by this stubborn sleep-lover, who will fight to the brink against the demands they made of themselves the very night before. They may indeed share a lot in common with the Manic, whose morning routines can be characterised only by the very lack of routine it holds.
With punctuality that could rival even the arrival of a British Summer, and obstinacy so forthright that it can only be described as principle, the Denier refuses to accept that their day has actually begun.
The alarm screeches suddenly like a violent scratch down an old chalkboard, yanking the Denier out of their sweet slumber. The Denier answers firmly, “No.” What sort of idiot would forego the comfort of their bed to get up and go to work? Well, just about every human out there actually… but we get your point!
So which do you identify with, or would you rather not confess?
By guest blogger Jacob Tucker
Image by Shutterstock